
Hey, can I pet that dog? CAN I PET THAT DOG?
Everyone’s favorite rabies filled good boy is coming back to action from NETFLIX. The Hollywood Reporter has confirmed that the film appears to be on the production fast track and REQUIEM FOR A DREAM and THE WHALE director, artsy fart Darren Aronofsky is in talks to direct.
Atleast we now know it won’t some sterile Blumhouse-ish PG-13 gobbledy gook. Aronofsky isn’t going to take his time to direct some corporate fart of a killer dog movie. There is the chance the dog speaks in French and the movie is made to be some sort of analogy for being gay and afraid of ice cream or something….but it should at least be interesting. I just hope nobody passes a baby around to eat like in Mother! Much too much. Not to mention you could just call him Darren Aron-dropskie because he often doesn’t follow through on these things. Fuck me, this is great writing.
The project is being produced by Roy Lee, the guy behind King adaptations like It, Doctor Sleep, and the upcoming Salem’s Lot remake (which was balls). Meanwhile, Netflix is still sniffing around for a writer.
For those unfamiliar, Cujo is the heartwarming tale of a lovable St. Bernard who, after an unfortunate run-in with a rabid bat, transforms into a slobbering murder beast that terrorizes a mother and son trapped inside a broken-down car. It’s one of the better early King adaptations and I’m only actually in if they use a real dog.
If the dog is CGI, this project can go suck a fuck. And it probably will be. Damn, I miss the 90s. Speaking of which, here is J and I watching that piece of poop Salem’s Lot Remake: